Real Self Worth
Real self worth
I would like to suggest that understanding one’s inherent self-worth—knowing what specific value you bring to the larger community—is essential in today’s complexity. You can praise Isabella from morning to night, tell her she is Daddy’s darling and beautiful. This in no way prepares her one small self to feels as if she matters and can make a difference in a world teeming with six billion people. On the other hand, if Isabella knows her gifts and talents--that she’s quite talented at helping others resolve fights; that her sense of humor can make a crying friend heal; that she can take herself from frustration to wonder by walking around; that playing the piano can melt her anger into honey; that she is very talented in innovative thinking which will help her design herself and others out of scary situations—then she feels as if she is unique and belongs to a world that needs her.
posted by DawnaMarkova at 10:54 AM
4 Comments:
It seems that the strengths you identify, her talents and gifts, are an expression of spirituality. I believe that when one is seeking to define and express who they really are, that it is a spiritual act. What you specify as her strengths connect her with others and with the world, and are not contingent on a learned and honed skill set. Rather, they are simply her, who she naturally is.
I believe it is essential for us to connect with others in a way that is validating and generous. In other words, our "people" accept us for who we are, and do not reject us if we make a mistake. Instead, they help us identify a solution, or at the least are supportive as we resolve it for ourselves. And we do the same for them.
As a result, we are built up and come to identify our own strengths, and how we can contribute to the benfit of our group, as its own reward. No trophies or demonstrative kudos are expected. The benefit or reward is feeling safe in the world, and the celebration in accepting the worthiness of self and others. Win-win.
August 28, 2007 at 9:30 AM
Falcon River was your friend?
November 8, 2009 at 4:24 PM
Dear Dawna,
Your blogs are fascinating, I would like to follow them however the last one was in 2005, do you have a new blog site?
I read about your new venture Smartwired and it sounds great, is this keeping you busy? I represent a client who is a physical intelligence trainer and she would love to know where your new (if you have one) blog is.
Thank you in advance,
Hannah
Amethyst Pa
November 15, 2010 at 8:26 AM
Knowing your self worth, while incredibly useful, is also very difficult to calculate (without some form of bias). Agree with the sentiment of the post though.
January 4, 2011 at 3:11 AM
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